Being Still. Being Present. Being Here. Being Quiet. Being in Truth.
These being
states might be a spiritual goal of yours. They certainly are for me.
It’s funny
though, because we can’t make ourselves be this way. We can’t even practise
these skills. Even meditation doesn’t do it. Meditation is a practice of
meditation, not of being still and quiet and being in truth. Unless it’s a
walking meditation, it’s about the body being still regardless of how painful
the body gets – and then its willpower!
Being still inside is a different thing altogether. Because it’s not about the body being still, it’s about a stillness inside, even when the body is moving in daily tasks, even when the brain is engaged in whatever it needs to do. I feel excited when I write this. Why? Because I have felt it. This stillness that is here inside me, even when life goes on. It feels so magical.
And sometimes illusive!! Those times when I suddenly realise that the stillness
is not here,
I catch myself in awareness. And in the catching, I go still. Usually.
When my mind
is busy and at the same time, not focused, that’s when the stillness isn’t
present. I caught myself the other day when someone rang me just when I was
about to call someone on skype. The phone call was unexpected. I thought that I
listened well, but later I realised that I had not been totally present and
certainly not still inside myself. Half my self was elsewhere concerned about
the skype call. I felt rather disgusted with myself about this. However, a few
days later a similar situation occurred and I was able to be still and present
in the moment, in each moment.
I often remind myself of a lesson that I learned
on Mt Arunachala in India – just one step. Not one step at a time, because this
implies that there will be a further step so it is slightly looking into the
future. But just this step. Just this moment. Being still.
The more we
bring ourselves to this moment, the more we can.
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