Monday, April 23, 2018
How does non-attachment work? Is it manifesting?
In my head I am trying to figure out how manifestation fits in with non-attachment.
Manifestation is feeling, sensing, and visualising something that you desire, without figuring out how it is going to happen. And then believing or knowing that it will happen. Right?
Non-attachment is not really manifesting, because it also includes an acceptance of whatever the result is – whether the result is what you desire or whether it is not. It’s taking the first step towards a goal, not knowing what the next steps are, and not compromising.
Sometimes we can think we are not-attached to a result and in our mind, we may not be. But underneath, there is something going on that has strings to the desired result. These strings can be deeply embedded and even unconscious. We may believe what we think (that we are not attached) because we haven’t delved deeper and may not see a reason to delve deeper.
I know there are times when I have taken a step towards a desired outcome and then thought “Whatever will be, will be”, thinking that I was unattached to the result. Thinking that I would accept whatever the result turned out to be. In hindsight, I was still attached to the outcome that I wanted. There were buried strings that created attachment to the result. I still wanted a particular outcome.
Recently, I experienced a situation of non-attachment. I was in a process of taking steps towards some work, which was going to be funded by a social service. Then came the tricky part of what do I charge. I was pleased that my mind quickly got past the perceived need to make it less than usual. And when questioned, I was able to give some options for looking at the hours in different ways, all of which still gave me my fee. Then I completely detached from it. So completely that I was aware that I neither wanted nor didn’t want the work. I had no strings to wanting it at all. Very freeing. Then after a few days the email came that agreed to my fee.
It was not a technique to get what I wanted. It truly was a case of non-attachment to the result, either way.
Actually, that’s the second example I’ve experienced lately. Maybe I was just ready for this. Maybe I was free enough in myself so that I could be non-attached. I know, that in the past, I have tried to be non-attached to a result. And the trying seems to get in the way. Or else, I just had too many unconscious strings.
Are you aware of how you attach to desired results?
Thursday, April 12, 2018
How good are you at fixing other people? How good are you at fixing yourself?
How much of your talking or communicating time do you devote to this? Just take an observation of yourself and be honest. When someone tells you about their relationship problem, or about their family issue, or about their health, or about their fitness, do you immediately give ideas for what they can do? Do you make one particular suggestion – the one you consider the right one? Do you follow up with the reasons or with emotive words to encourage the person to do that particular idea?
Is it a human thing? To tell people what to do to improve their situation? To make suggestions? With or without options? Or is it just western society that does this? Or is it my family that have this pattern?
Anyway, I have been thinking of this lately. And I know that I perceive this as being controlled at times. It’s as if, when someone tells me a solution, whether worded as a suggestion or not, that I feel I am expected to follow that suggestion. It’s a “should” do!! Which might not be the case at all. Though I also sense at times, that the person definitely expects me to follow the suggestion. I sense disapproval. But is this really the case or is it just my interpretation?
So there is that side of it.
And the other side is….that I do it too.
You know, it’s a great opportunity for us to look at others behaviour or words, and then ask ourselves: How do I do that? Because if we notice it in others, you can guarantee that we do it too. And then we have a way to fix ourselves. Ah ha!! But maybe this is not fixing – words EH! Maybe it is developing, improving, growing? Take your pick about which word you use.
And really, it is a gift. This is one way to grow our awareness of our patterns and behaviours and communications. And we do not have to try and fix ourselves. Purely by having the awareness, there will be opportunities to play it differently. It’s as if, an unconscious intention arises from the awareness. An intention to drop that pattern.
So I look forward to doing less making suggestions and more listening. I look forward to dropping that pattern. And the purpose? To live in truth. Awareness allows us to drop the conditioning of our earlier life and live from the truth of us.